The walks down by the American River here in Sacramento brought me time to reflect…and capture more photos of this singular swan. Pictures like the one above (I’ve got many!) show me many things. Last month, I mentioned the loneliness of leadership. 70% of pastors report NOT having someone they consider a close friend. (Barna, 2023). Harvard Business Publishing reports that same 70% among new CEOs.

Harvard Business Publishing noted that more than 70% of new CEOs report feelings of loneliness, a sentiment not exclusive to them but prevalent across various leadership levels. Loneliness is particularly acute among individuals newly promoted to leadership positions. The implications of such loneliness are profound, likened to the health impact of smoking 15 cigarettes a day.  (From the Perceptyx blog)

The importance of having someone walk alongside us in leadership cannot be underestimated. To have someone listen to us when we feel “muted” is crucial. I have learned that this swan is a “mute swan,” so named because it is less vocal than the aptly named “trumpeter swan.” It is not that the mute swan is completely silent. It is simply “less vocal.” For me personally, that phrase resonates. Moving from speaking nearly every week to hundreds of people to a posture of listening has already made me notice several things. The rise and fall of adrenaline in my body has changed. (Though I have still had dreams of getting up to speak and not being prepared—that raises my adrenaline!).

Something else I have recognized is this: how much I have relied on my many words—even in my family—to bring about change. I have believed that if I just have the opportunity to explain myself more, use the right metaphor, illustration, and tie it all together with a powerful story, that everyone will see things my way! Being ‘less vocal’ might also be a good posture for leaders in general. To listen first, be “slow to speak,” and not rely solely on leadership by voice may be what is needed in this moment.

I have heard from other leaders throughout the years, and experienced myself, the feeling of being “muted” in leadership. Whether it is not knowing how to lead with clarity, or trying to speak for what needs to change and it coming across wrong, or being misunderstood, leaders in every sphere can feel muted.

The work I am aiming to do among leaders has a certain silence about it. That is, because it is confidential care and coaching, I cannot share all the details of stories of this ministry. For these reasons and many more, I think God might have placed this mute swan on this little body of water to get my attention. After all, wasn’t it Jesus who said, “Consider the birds…” 

I am now serving with a ministry called Standing Stone, which has aimed for twenty years to provide a space for free, confidential coaching and care for pastors, ministry leaders, and leaders of every sphere. Standing Stone believes that healthy leaders need companions on their leadership journey, and that healthy leaders will lead healthy organizations that help transform their communities. You can learn more here: https://standingstoneministry.org/shepherd/burke-david/