“I’ve learned how to do ‘just enough.’”  This was an honest confession from a leader I met with recently, who has been in a particular role for some time.  They weren’t proud of this confession; rather, they knew something was wrong. 

I’ve been writing the last few times about when we might know we need a change.  Change in how we do our work, and what we do for work.   

We might need a change:

When our body is telling us to.

When we aren’t celebrating what everyone else is celebrating.

And, when we find ourselves doing just enough, but not bringing our best, creative selves to our work. 

Leadership in every sphere of work is hard and can be lonely.  The feeling of always being “on” is tiring.  That exhaustion can be compounded by the expectation that we place on ourselves, or that we feel others have of us. That expectation includes the thought that we must lead every meeting and gathering, have the answer, and know how to navigate unforeseen situations.

After years of running at a fast pace, I often hear of leaders confess to trying to do “just enough.”  Whether it is preparing a sermon, presentation, paper, or report, they have learned the short-cuts and time-saving tools that gets the job done, “just enough.”  At the same time, I hear a bit of remorse and regret as they talk about this. They have learned that they can’t dedicate the time they want to all these things, and don’t feel like they have been at their most creative.  

Workplace research uses terms like “low engagement,” or “quiet quitting.” One model speaks of the relationship between job demands and resources (the JD-R model).  When the demands of one’s job far outweigh the employee’s perceived resources for autonomy, feedback, or development, that employee is more likely to disengage or do “just enough.”  This workplace studies claim that the results for an organization can be extremely detrimental, as it leads to stagnant growth, lack of innovation, and poor team morale. 

Noticing this “just enough” mentality is the first step.  Digging deeper into the “why” is crucial.  Is it a perceived lack of control of the demands of our work?  That is, do we find ourselves constantly reacting to what is being asked of us, but not having any agency or initiative? Or, is it a sign that it is time for a change?  

An Honest Plea For Support

I am able to offer this coaching and care for leaders for free because of the generosity of people like you.  Due to recent changes in some people’s capacity to give, I am in need of additional support this year to keep this work going.  My goal is $1,000 per month in new or increased support.  If you have never given to this work, I’d love to talk to you personally about it and ask for your support. If you are able to increase your monthly gift, would you please consider that as well?  There is a link below to give.

I am serving with a ministry called Standing Stone, which has aimed for over twenty years to provide a space for free, confidential coaching and care for pastors, ministry leaders, and leaders of every sphere. Standing Stone believes that healthy leaders need companions on their leadership journey, and that healthy leaders will lead healthy organizations that help transform their communities. You can learn more here: https://standingstoneministry.org/shepherd/burke-david/

“Look, the place is full again!”

A board member told this to a pastor, who was telling me the story.  They were standing in the back of their Sunday morning gathering.  The board member had an excited look on their face, clapping the pastor on the back as he said it. And the pastor told me, “And I didn’t feel anything.”

Last time I wrote, I spoke about how we know it might be time for a change.  Change  in how we approach our work, our boundaries in work and life, or when ultimately it might be time to leave.  In Part 1 of this series, I wrote about how our health might be a sign of the need to change.  In Part 2, I want to talk about noticing what we celebrate.

The story above is true, and came in the context of the years following 2021, where attendance at church had taken a deep dive in this church.  A few years later, the pastor was noticing how much his fellow staff and leadership was concerned with “getting people back in the building.”  When a board member celebrated that day where it seemed like “people were back,” this pastor noticed his lack of excitement about it.  

He told me, “I found myself saying, “So what?”  

There is nothing wrong with more people coming to a church.  There is nothing inherently wrong with growth in an organization.  But if numerical growth is the primary value, and the leadership does not share that same value, then that is a recipe for a problem.  This pastor shared with me that he no longer was motivated by the crowd, and didn’t know what to do with that. 

I recently read an article in Inc. that spoke of “surface acting” in organizations.  Surface acting “involves employees and business leaders either adopting emotional responses to what they believe are required of them in workplace settings, or quashing the display of sincere feelings they fear may not be professionally well received. It turns out all that careful adjusting and censorship of internal reactions on the job often proves to be exhausting.”

In other words, feigning excitement for the sake of the organization wears people out.  In the work I do with pastors and organizational leaders, I hear them speak of this, even if they don’t use the words “surface acting.”  The values and priorities of the organization seem to may initially resonate with the individual, but as time passes, each leader may begin to change their priorities.  

I’m working with a number of younger leaders, who first began their work because they loved a particular part of it—meeting with young people, or teaching and helping people learn in smaller settings.  But, as the leader is recognized for their work and gifts, they often “move up” in their responsibilities, which ironically takes them further and further away from what they first loved.  

At first read, this might appear to be the “natural” growth that comes with leadership. But when leaders find themselves “surface acting,” and no longer able to honestly celebrate what the organization is celebrating, it may be time for a change. 

Can you identify what you celebrate in your work?

An Honest Plea For Support

I am able to offer this coaching and care for leaders for free because of the generosity of people like you.  Due to recent changes in some people’s capacity to give, I am in need of additional support this year to keep this work going.  My goal is $1,000 per month in new or increased support.  If you have never given to this work, I’d love to talk to you personally about it and ask for your support. If you are able to increase your monthly gift, would you please consider that as well?  There is a link below to give.

I am serving with a ministry called Standing Stone, which has aimed for over twenty years to provide a space for free, confidential coaching and care for pastors, ministry leaders, and leaders of every sphere. Standing Stone believes that healthy leaders need companions on their leadership journey, and that healthy leaders will lead healthy organizations that help transform their communities. You can learn more here: https://standingstoneministry.org/shepherd/burke-david/

When I ask, “Is it time for a change?” I mean it could be several things:

Change of schedule. 

Change of priorities.   

Change of job description.  

Change of role.  

Change of career.

Change by leaving where you are.

Now, I understand that many of us do not have the control to change much of the above.   I also acknowledge the “stuck-ness” many of us feel because we have responsibilities—family, home, financial obligations and realities. Not to mention the fact that we may have invested years of education and training into a career, only to find it different than what we expected. Or, we have climbed the “ladder” of our career, and found the rung we are on is nothing like we enjoyed in the beginning.  Change has a real cost, and in some cases, may not be possible. 

Still, based on conversations with leaders in various spheres–non-profits, business, and the church–and in reflecting on several transitions I’ve had in my life, I’ve heard some recurring themes when people are considering or needing a change.  

When our physical health is telling us to.  

One leader spoke of feeling their heart rate increase as they approached their office after some time away.  They felt a change in their body.  Other leaders report feeling a constant tightness in their chest, butterflies in their stomach, or lack of appetite while at work.   

Recent data by the Barna group:

Physical, emotional and mental health among pastors is lower than the general population…and notably behind practicing Christians. This is especially alarming since a leader’s wholeness is intertwined with their ministry, for better or for worse. Barna researchers have observed a strong link between pastors’ falling conviction in their vocational calling and a drop in their overall mental, emotional and even physical well-being. Pastors with diminished well-being may have a higher risk of burnout.  (see report here)

In my 25 years of being a pastor, I remember thinking that things like working out or taking time for exercise felt “selfish” amidst the many needs of people we were serving.  I’m sure the same is true for people in other professions.  Organizational culture may reward those who sacrifice everything for the mission, to the neglect of other priorities, even one’s health.  

Truth be told—a lot of us have learned to ignore or push past the physical signs until it’s simply not possible any more.  We say, “I don’t have time to be sick,”  and fuel ourselves with over-the-counter medications to mask the symptoms. Though intellectually we may agree that we are created in God’s image, with body, mind, and spirit, we often prioritize the mind or spirit and push past the signals our bodies may be sending.  

When was the last time you noticed what your body was telling you?

What are the signs you pay attention to that inform you that you’re pushing yourself too hard?

What do you want to change when it comes to your health?

THANK YOU!

I began raising financial support for this work in late 2023.  Now, as I begin 2026, I remain fully supported thanks to partners like you.  I will be needing to raise additional support in a few months, as several partners have had to change their giving over the past two years.  Thank you for making this work possible!

I am serving with a ministry called Standing Stone, which has aimed for over twenty years to provide a space for free, confidential coaching and care for pastors, ministry leaders, and leaders of every sphere. Standing Stone believes that healthy leaders need companions on their leadership journey, and that healthy leaders will lead healthy organizations that help transform their communities. You can learn more here: https://standingstoneministry.org/shepherd/burke-david/